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I Survived. Now What?

I Survived. Now What?

These are strange days. I’m a few months into remission and I am spinning in new ways. There are these moments when I feel elated. Late at night, while walking my dog I will step out of the front door, look up at the stars and feel an overwhelming […]

Valentine’s Day Gift Guide / PeepShowToys.com

Valentine’s Day Gift Guide / PeepShowToys.com

Splurging on something luscious and sexy can be a great pick-me-up. Why? When you spend money on some element of our lives it elevates the importance and drives us to be more committed. If your sex life (with yourself or a partner) has been lagging, […]

Valentine’s Day Gift Guide / ComeAsYouAre.com

Valentine’s Day Gift Guide / ComeAsYouAre.com

This little Canadian company is full of heart! The owners come and go because it’s a worker-owned cooperative, but collectively I have friends who have been happily entangled with them for almost 15 years. My entanglement with them means I have been eating food with them, flopping down on couches in Toronto for long conversations with them, teaching workshops, doing staff training, and shopping their store all these years! Every time I visit them I find unique items and gifts that I inevitably have to drop some of my paycheck on.

Look at this golden cock. Look at it! Oben 2 by BS Atelier one of the most unique dildos I have ever seen. Made of body-safe, nonporous 100% silicone, featuring this beautiful blend of colors that create this golden ombré effect. The shaft is dual density, having a harder core and softer outer layer. It’s petite at 4.72 inches in length by 1.1 inches in width. The oval shaped base means it is harness compatible and suitable for anal play as well. ($63 at Come As You Are, free shipping within Canada)

gold strap on harness

How do you strap on a golden cock? With a Golden Leather Harness by Unicorn Collaborators, of course! Fits up to a 55″ hip, and 22″ thigh. ($150 at Come As You Are, free shipping in USA and Canada)
You’ll find a lot more than just sex toys on this site, they have a real knack for introducing me to other items like Lynn’s Lotion Body Massage Bar. ($8) They sent me a love package with this solid lotion bar and I found it melts perfectly into a thick winter lotion that is ideal for elbows, knees, and feet. Plus it’s so cute. I have the bumblebee version. They also have these cocoa & shea butter massage melts that I am gonna have to try at some point. ($4.50)

Speaking of warm sensations… I am curious to try these Play Wax Pillars. ($10) They come in a variety of colors and are handmade in Canada. They slowly burn at a low temperature so they are safe to drip on your lover’s skin. I also recommend getting a copy of Guide To Hot Wax And Temperature Play. It taught me everything I needed to know about playing with wax safely. ($13.99)

It used to be that progressive sex shops were a great place to get exposed to hard to find books and the ideas they contained. Come As You Are is one of the few progressive sex shops that despite the low-profit margins has continued to stock books. You can find groundbreaking classic sexuality books and new releases that they feel will resonate with their customers, like The Science of Trust. ($46) This book speaks to emotional attunement and how to help relationships weather tough times. They also carry my book! ($21.50)

I feel like every vagina-owner deserves a Vadge Of Honour Patch. ($8) It’s just a fact. They also have these super cute Vagina & Vulva Pins! ($5)

Finally, if you are in the Toronto area I recommend checking out their Erotic Arts & Crafts Show this Saturday! Their twitter feed is full of teasers about the artists and crafts you’ll find there!


Full disclosure: There are no affiliate links in this post. I am just sharing things I like.

Valentine’s Day Gift Guide / HipsAndCurves.com

Valentine’s Day Gift Guide / HipsAndCurves.com

I’ve been window shopping again! Here are some of my favorite plus size lingerie picks for the Valentines this year! The little ties that keep the top of this baby doll closed just beg to be untied! The halter style top ensures it will fit. […]

Valentine’s Day Gift Guide / SheVibe.com

Valentine’s Day Gift Guide / SheVibe.com

It’s almost Valentine’s Day, which means I have to roll over all my favorite site and see if there are any holiday inspired items I need. (Yes, celebrating holidays is a NEED for me!) Here are the Valentine’s Day items at Shevibe.com that pique my interest […]

Oh I Like This / Jan 2018

Oh I Like This / Jan 2018

__________NEW YEAR__________

Hi! I am pretty well healed! I am moving out of full sloth mode and into some more active means of caring for myself. How? Well, I have this list I made while I was in the thick of cancer treatment of things to look forward to. Now I need to make them happen!

My big goal is to get some of this fat off of my body. (Fat produces estrogen, estrogen has the potential to produce cancer in my body.) I need to get strong so I can get back to martial arts.

I also just sent another email to this local organization that does housing advocacy for the elderly, mentally ill and homeless individuals. I submitted my application to volunteer last month but have not heard back. Either they are overwhelmed and really need me, or they don’t need me at all. Either way, I’m gonna try to put my skills to use. If not for them, then for some other organization. As a formerly homeless person, I can not sit back and hope that someone else takes care of the problems in my community. If you don’t know… volunteering is a super awesome selfish act… for many, it elevates depression and makes your heart feel good. I recommend it.

__________YUM__________

I am really excited about this cookbook. It’s called Greens Glorious Greens!: More than 140 Ways to Prepare All Those Great-Tasting, Super-Healthy, Beautiful Leafy Greens and it’s full of recipes that take what may have been bland leaves and turns them into deliciousness!

Oh and my friend sent me some of these San Jaun Island Sea Salt blends. They are amazing! If you are a pervert for spices like I am… get some!

__________FEEL GOOD__________

At work, we use bonus.ly. Everyone in the office gets points at the beginning of the month. If someone helps you with a project or goes above and beyond we can give each other points as a thank you and recognition. I recently cashed my points in for a Sephora gift card and scored this stunning Bite Beauty Lipstick in a color called beetroot. It’s a deep, dark, sexy lip color. I also got a pallet of Stellar Stardust Lip Powder. The powder is great for layering. It adds some metallic shimmer.

__________SEXY__________

I have always loved Eric Stanton’s illustrations. Here’s a great collection of his pulp book covers. I wrote this article on sex toy materials. I also answered this question about sex toys throughout history and this piece on why people engage in kinky sex. On this podcast, EmmelinePeaches talks about how fitness effects sexual wellness. And for those who like to wear your cock, AFemmeCock has this cool tutorial on how to make a rope strap-on.

__________READ__________

My_Favorite Thing is Monsters coverMy family gave me some beautiful books for the holidays. My Favorite Thing is Monsters is a huge, beautiful graphic novel, page after page of beautifully drawn storytelling.

My husband gave me a copy of The Quotable Anais Nin: 365 Quotations with Citations. He also gave me Raw Erotica: Sex, Lust and Desire in Outsider Art. I do love outsider art, but this volume is more about explicitness than it is erotica. Still a lovely and disturbing book.

__________THANK YOU__________

Thank you to beyonddelights.com for coming to my online classes for retailers and turning what they learn into thoughtful articles, like this one on sex and unwanted pain. I love seeing good hearted companies bringing good things into the world.

Thanks to Women of Sex Tech for inviting me to be a part of your group. I am honored to be a part of this powerful force!

Thank you (x1000) to Lilly for telling the world I am one of her blogging inspirations. This is a huge compliment.

The Truth About Menopause

The Truth About Menopause

If you are new here, I recently survived cancer. In doing so I had to accept going into abrupt surgical menopause. I have had no hormone replacement options available as they stand a high chance of causing more cancer in my body. But you know […]

You Heal Me / You Fuel Me

You Heal Me / You Fuel Me

Now that I have beaten cancer (OMG that feels so good to say!) I will start blogging about how I manage my medical bills, the insurance company, and the VA. (My husband is a disabled combat veteran. I figure there are more vets and those […]

Here’s What I’m Cooking for Christmas Dinner

Here’s What I’m Cooking for Christmas Dinner

It’s Christmas dinner on a budget, but I think it will still be beautiful! I’m making this chicken recipe my husband found. I could not find creme fraiche at the store, so I made some from scratch. (I now have a bunch of buttermilk… I’m not sure what to do with it? I am taking suggestions if you have any?)

I’m making these bacon-wrapped green bean bundles and deviled eggs. I’ll whip up some gravy by hand but the stuffing and mash potatoes will be out of a box.

For dessert, I’m making him a pecan pie. I am making myself these 3 ingredient flourless brownies. [EDIT: Don’t make that brownie recipe! It was horrible!] I have a frosting recipe but I don’t know where it came from because it’s scribbled on a paper. It looks like this:

Chocolate Protein Frosting [EDIT: This was bluck too!]

  • 2 scoops chocolate protein powder
  • 1-2 tbs sweetener of your choice
  • 1-2 tbs nut or seed butter
  • 1 tbs milk or liquid

At the end of the night, I’ll wrap the leftover chicken in pie dough and pop that chicken pot pie in the freezer for another night.

I Hide My Tears / But Not Very Well

I Hide My Tears / But Not Very Well

I am a very stoic individual. I don’t like to express my pain or vulnerabilities publically. I was at work when the doctor called. He did not ask me where I was or prepare me for the news. He just said hello, told me who […]

This is What A Sex Worker Looks Like

This is What A Sex Worker Looks Like

I left Show World on a high note. I left before I was totally burned out. My soul intact. Sure I had my rough days at the peepshows: an attempted assault here or there or people trying to coerce me in various ways. But I […]